I’m still here, I’ve just been a bit busy

Well, Dear Reader, it seems like an age since we last communicated. it’s not that I’ve got nothing to say anymore. Far from it. I’ve got loads of stuff going round and round in my head but it probably wouldn’t be very nice of me to tell you about it. I mean, it’s other people’s privacy we’re talking about. And it would sound like the most massive WHINGE. So I’ve stayed away rather than bore you. But I miss you so here’s a quick update of what I’ve been up to this week:

MONDAY

  • Fret about latest in a line of major surgeries on cousin far away. Delight that she has come through operation on multiple organs tinged with embarrassment that I texted her sister at 2am. It’s the time difference, you see. But they were awake.
  • Take Darling Daughter to hypnotherapist to try and sort out her constant dizziness. I unaccountably burst into tears but don’t dare to move a muscle lest it ruins the hypnotic effect and becomes all about ME.
  • Heating broken for second time in a week. Boiler fan has gone AGAIN. Freezing. Leave cross message on boiler maintenance company’s answering machine, fully aware it’s probably more the fault of the tea-swilling excuse-monkey builders and incompetent managing architect who botched everything in our house in 2005. Bob the Boiler always says that spare parts are hard to come by for this model. They probably found our boiler somewhere in a skip in Ecuador. Shall I name and shame? Tempted.
  • Request replacement password for online cardigan order. Three times. None works.
  • Do some rows of knitting. This is the third time I have tried to knit this fiendishly-cabled pattern and it keeps going wrong. I’ve unravelled the yarn twice and its alpaca fuzziness means it keeps tangling itself up. I throw it across the room in disgust
  • Phone call from mother. I confirm that no, she can’t come around on Wednesday as I’ll be at the hairdresser’s. And yes, she has to fast for 13 hours before the blood test on Thursday. And yes she can drink some water.

TUESDAY

  • Panicking at consequences of month-long Green and Black Caramel binge. Have put on 3Kg. Or perhaps scales are broken. Anyway, can’t go to gym as have to arrange MRI scan for Darling Daughter perhaps today, then drop her off to school.
  • Walk dog then wait in for Bob the Boiler. Try to get to grips with writing article for gundog club Yearbook. How on earth was I roped into this? Freeze.
  • OH “misses” train home. Pub quiz in evening. Our team (I’m 1st sub) comes 4th. I try not to think of all my rejected correct answers.

WEDNESDAY

  • Oh, yes, this is a nice day, largely.
  • Take delivery of cardigan. They have sent me the wrong model and it has to be returned. Organise returns label and replacement.
  • Into London to have a Brazilian. Hair treatment, not well, HAIR treatment. Enjoy the whole Brazilian experience but this means I’ll have to use an umbrella in the damp weather. Hate umbrellas. Salesperson in sunglasses shop in Covent Garden likes my “look.” Am flattered but then cynical because she is, after all, trying to sell me sunglasses, which I know I don’t need (especially in this poor weather) but am actually going to buy anyway. For the look. So neh.
  • Return from London and am just taking off shoes when Mother arrives on doorstep without, apparently, any recollection that I told her not to come. Breezes in. No chance to do singing practice. Get cross and frustrated with mum, who is belligerent and self-centred. Muse upon whether this is because of dementia or whether it is just her. Decide it is just her. As requested by the warden of her block, I raise complaints about her from other residents, which she flatly denies. Fret.
  • Vast amounts of laundry.
  • Arrange doctor’s letter for Darling Daughter’s forthcoming sax exam. Dizziness is causing disturbed vision. If her vision is disturbed, how will she cope with sight-reading section of exam, even though her sight-reading is very good? Fret.
  • Husband late home from work again. Ironing all evening. Then have a good cry from self-pity over a glass of wine.

THURSDAY

  • Receive quick email from poorly cousin. Am delighted.
  • Drive Darling Daughter to bus stop in pyjamas (and raincoat) because she has a sax and a clarinet to carry and she is dizzy. Yes, I have become one of THOSE mums. Her brother, who would normally help her, has gone off early dressed as Bob the Builder as it is last day for Year 11 before their exam leave. Text from Darling Daughter on my return informs me that she has forgotten that it is own clothes day and I volunteer to take some clothes into school as I don’t want her to feel even worse.
  • Pick up mother and drive her to her doctor’s. She is not sure why she is there and I wonder if she has actually fasted for 13 hours. Apparently, despite participating in a telephone consultation with my mother’s doctor, I have to provide a letter with mother’s signature that she agrees that I can discuss her test results over the phone. If I don’t, she’ll never find them out.
  •  Decide to go straight to Darling Daughter’s school with clothes for her to pick up at morning break. This will give mother a treat as she likes a little jaunt in the car. Have huge, irrational row with cantankerous mother. Feel extremely cantankerous myself.
  • Drop mother off home then go straight out and walk the dog for two hours. Go to Post Office on way to post application for summer music course for offspring and French exchange partner. It has to be weighed, you see, as it contains 6 sheets of paper and I’m not sure one stamp will cover the postage. 50p second class!!!
  • Bob the Boiler arrives and fixes heating, hooray! But I have missed courier delivery. Arrange for that to be delivered tomorrow and left in a safe place if I am out.
  • Take dog around to friend’s house for a playdate with his new puppy. Dog has to be kept on long lead lest he wreaks havoc with friend’s tree peony. Hm. He hasn’t ever had a dog.
  • Make sure Darling Daughter has eaten in time to take her back to school for concert. I love this one. It’s an annual concert of small chamber groups all arranged in different places on three floors around the atrium of the school’s theatre building. Both offspring are playing this evening. Free wine for a change. Yum.
  • Boywonder walks in almost too late dressed as Bob the Builder. Trumpet Boy, say  no more.
  • OH does not arrive at concert. Receive a text that he’s forgotten about it. Cross. Upside of this is that there’s a pie heating up on our arrival home.
  • Look at dog article. Decide to leave it till tomorrow.

FRIDAY

    • Cleaning lady does not arrive. She has forgotten to come. Chase her up and she arrives, apologetic.
    • Darling Daughter still ill and dizzy. Keeps texting me that she just wants to come home from school. I think back to how cheery she is when she’s with her friends at school. She’s going to hate me for not giving her permission to come home early.
    • Boywonder has a piano lesson today, followed by his first GCSE. Maths. I’ll take him in as I’ve got to go near there for my Singing Aural lesson. Fret about Boywonder, hoping that he’s managed to pull himself back from the brink of failure, and that I haven’t done enough singing practice. Do singing practice.
    • Take Boywonder into school. Am early for Aural lesson so wait in car near teacher’s house for 20 minutes. When I finally approach her house, a flooring man is there and says that she is out all day. She has forgotten our lesson. Grr.
    • Go over to Post Office to drop off wrongly-sized cardigan for it to be sent back. Come home and walk dog, but dog has decided he’s going to mount the first two dogs he sees. Tell him off and finish the walk with him on the lead, in silence.
    • Blog. Miss lunch

It’s a fairly typical week really, for a lady-of-leisure stay at home mum.

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