The Slendertone Face machine

A few months ago, I sat at the hairdresser’s peering critically at myself in the mirror through half-closed eyes, not wanting to look the truth in the eye. The hairdresser’s mirror test: harshest of all. I observed my sagging face and baggy eyes and concluded that I needed a) a lot more sleep and b) a facelift. Not, of course, that I was in a position to do anything about either of these requirements.

Then my dear cyber-chum and style go-to-girl, @dulwichmum, a longtime Slendertone afficionada, newly equipped with the Slendertone Face machine, thought it would be a jolly wheeze if a group of Twitter chums all did it at the same time and compared notes on Twitter between twitches. She waved her magic wand and made it happen, and a few days later I sat there in my Princessly Tower trying desperately to work out how to fit the sticky gel pads to the Slendertone Face headset without sticking myself to my Farrow & Ball decorated bedroom wall.

After a few attempts wrestling with said pads I eventually managed to wrestle them straight onto the electrical connection terminals and I was ready to twitch. I pride myself on my high pain threshold so, positioning the unit directly under my hidden cheekbones as directed, I turned the machine up to about 75% of its full power and, bracing myself against my bed, let it do its work for the next 20 minutes, twitching and releasing, twitching and releasing, my eyes closing, my cheek muscles contracting rhythmically in anticipation of the next buzz. When I could tolerate each level, I would increase the intensity until at one point during the 6 week trial I had reached level 95. Out of 99. I do like to push myself.

The effects were almost immediate. Within a couple of days my cheekbones were so defined that I could tell with ease exactly where to place my blusher. Within two or three weeks, my husband said that I looked “gaunt,” which was meant as a compliment. By the end of the six week trial, I had dimples in my cheeks that I had never before discovered.

I have a round face which is prone to look fat so was delighted with the razor sharp, lifted face that the Slendertone Face provided. With such a small face, it is somewhat difficult to place the pads directly though and I would not advise use of the machine in a public place where a winking user might be mistaken for an outrageous flirt.

Regular readers will know that I went to India last week with just three week’s notice: time put to good use with a five day Slendertone Face course. Because now, of course, having achieved my taut, toned face, I’m not inclined to let anything slip. Not that it does so easily: last night, not having used the machine for a good week, I was complimented by someone who has not seen me for a few weeks and who told me that I had lost weight. A definite result then!


And the hairdresser’s chair test? I can confirm I no longer look baggy or saggy and I am no longer pulling up the skin behind my eyes to simulate a Siamese cat dragged through a hedge backwards facelift look. Hooray!

Cautions are that facial muscles, just as other muscles, cannot remained taut and toned without consistent exercise but I shall make sure I have enough sets of gel pads for any emergency pre-event six week Slendertone Face course. Apparently these are available from Boots.

I was a Slendertone sceptic. I am convinced.

Small print: I was sent the Slendertone Face machine, which costs just over £300, asked to tweet about it honestly twice per day, which I did. I am making it the subject of this post because it is truly one of my Favourite Things.



7 thoughts on “The Slendertone Face machine

  1. Goodness that looks impressive. I caught sight of my sagging chin in a strategically placed mirror the other day. I’m tempted to try shocking it back into place!

  2. I’m going to go for it I’m getting droopy either side of my lips it’s like I’m smiling upside down sometimes ,I’ll let you know how I get on. Wish me luck ladies.

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